It's not my time

14 comments
Sometimes, no matter how badly you want something, it just isn’t your time.

And when it is *YOU* that has to come to that realization, it can be very, very difficult.

This is something I have been thinking about for weeks (OK, well over a month really) and it was something that only I could decide for myself.

I have decided that is it not my time to become a Weight Watcher leader.

Why you ask??

Because it is my personal belief that if your heart & mind are not 100% connected, then why do it??

I became a Lifetime Weight Watcher on December 23rd 2010. Nothing but a week later, I was hired to be an employee, followed by doing a Success Story shoot for Weight Watchers, followed by going to Oprah, followed by newspaper appearances and such. All the while, trying to train for my job as a Leader…work on my running…work my full time job…take care of my house…take care of my family…take care of myself.

I haven’t had time to just BE.

Be Suzi…be a Weight Watcher lifetime member…be a runner…be just a normal girl who is trying to learn about the new body she has made for herself.

I'm not saying I have this crazy, glamous, rock star life because I really do not.  But when you go from an obese chick who never liked to leave her house & go out in public, to where I am today...it can be a lot to take in.  Again as I have said before, not that I am not grateful for all these experiences.  I mean, they are AMAZING and I look forward to hopefully more to come.

Do I want to inspire others?? OF COURSE!! Hell, that’s what I try to do everyday, especially here on this blog. Really, it’s the only reason I *do* blog. But sometimes I feel so mentally exhausted that my desire to go and inspire people on a weekly basis is just not stimulating to me right now. And that’s not fair to my fellow staff or especially to the amazing members walking through that door each week.

This is a really hard decision for me, because I really do want to be a leader so badly. But I have to be honest about how I feel right now. I need to take some time out to inspire *myself* for a little while.

So, that is what I hope to do this summer….work on my running and training for the full marathon in October. October is also when I will reach my 10 month’s at Lifetime and as long as I keep weighing at goal (knock on wood), I get another little celebration key!! Spend this summer actually LOVING my body instead of hiding it from the sunshine & world…learning to be more comfortable in my own skin.

I will revisit the leader role around mid-fall/winter and see how I feel. There is no need to rush any of this, as my amazing bosses have reassured me.  I just need to be honest with myself, and I truly do believe that right now at this very moment, this position is not for me....yet.

In the meantime I’m just looking forward to being me, without so much pressure.

14 comments:

  1. I really appreciate this post. I love where you head is at. I hope to be there myself one of these days.

    Brad

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  2. Sounds like you've added up all the pros and cons and come up with the best plan for you. Bravo! :)

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  3. good for you, girl. admitting something like this takes a lot of thought and courage. xo

    thanks for being here to inspire us. even though i'm still fat, you've made a world of difference to me. :) i can't wait to be where you are!

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  4. Admitting and confronting fears is a huge step in any journey (I really hate that word now that Biggest Loser has overplayed it). Being honest with yourself is one thing, but sometimes we have to be honest out loud, so other people can hear us. Its part of the personal accountability. If only I know my goals, weaknesses, etc its easy to skip workouts or whatever. Thanks for sharing that not every rockstar feels like a rockstar.

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  5. It's tough to admit our own fears and deal with it. Good for you! Good luck with everything :)

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  6. Good for you for realizing it ahead of time! I love your blog fyi...just found it :)

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  7. You ARE an inspiration! And what is most inspiring is that you aren't afraid to do what you think is best for YOU versus doing what you think you are supposed to do. Keep doing you :)

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  8. Happy you have made the decision that is right for you. I'm learning that just because something is or should be right doesn't mean it is the right time. I hope you inspire yourself as much as you inspire me every single day!

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  9. Good for you for being brave and self-aware enough to say no!

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  10. I loved this post. I love that you have the confidence to do what is right for you and not be afraid to say no.

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  11. Hi I know you dont know me but my WW leader path is very similiar to yours that I have to share with you. I too have lost 129 pounds and now am a WW leader But I waited about 2 years. I had the press, ran marathons, interviews and TV after hitting goal and then I wanted to become a leader. But It was not meant to be. And I dont regret it at all. I have heard from the "WW research" that It takes about a year sometimes 2 for members who have lost over 100 pounds to reach and get to know their new identity. You will know when you are ready. In the meantime enjoy U and continue to be an inspiration to us online! I have no regrets in waiting. It was soooo worth it. I just wanted to let you know how similiar my path was to yours. :) You are making the right decision.

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  12. Sue

    I am so proud of you!!!! You are the biggest inspiration. And you will make an amazing leader when you are ready. Take the time to enjoy all that you have accomplished. You have had a lot going on these past few months, take some time for you and your family. You said it perfectly take time to just "BE".

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  13. Sometimes it takes more guts to say "no" than it does to say "yes." Enjoy the new life you've created! You've earned it.

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  14. the world needs more people like you who know that if their heart isnt in their place to inspire, they shouldnt be there.

    At some point you'll be in the place to be a leader, your heart, head and body will all be in the same place!

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