You know what’s great about losing weight?? LOSING WEIGHT!!
The feeling you get when you hop (or gently step on, whatever your personal preference is…maybe a run & jump??) on that scale and see that number has gone down…DEFEAT! YOU WIN! GOBBLEGOBBLEGOBBLE <----that’s my pacman sound effect.
And being able to get on the blogs, Twitter and what have you and share your success, well that’s just the best! Getting the praise and awe and being told that you are the best thing to ever live (I’m pretty sure one of you told me that once) give you such a feeling of accomplishment that it helps to bring you to NEXT weeks accomplishment.
So what happens when we stop stepping on the scale?? What happens when we are NO longer TRYING to lose weight??
I’m stuck in limbo right now to be honest. As a lifetime member of Weight Watchers (still feels *SO* strange to say that) I only need to weigh-in once a month. Now of course, I can weigh in anytime I want and as much as I want but I don’t want to be “that” person.
By “that” person, I mean one who is owned by the scale. Sure, I step on the one I have at home every morning (and yes, that is my preferred method…stepping on). It helps to keep me in check. It gives me a guideline if you will, of maybe what I can or cannot splurge in that day. But I don’t let it own me nor do I let it define my success!
But it’s difficult in a way to not get weighed in “officially” every week. Sure, I COULD step on the scale every week, but am I just going to beat myself up for the weeks when I am up?? Am I really living on the plan or am I still trying to hold onto to that losing weight feeling?? I’m still learning how to just *BE* at this weight. At my Lifetime weigh-in I was .4 ounces shy of officially hitting the 100 lbs lost mark. I say officially because I know I’ve lost about 109 lbs total. About 4 months prior to going back to meetings I started doing Weight Watchers myself with the knowledge I knew from going previously and lost about 11 lbs on my own. There is an ENORMOUS part of me that wants to get my 100 lb charm and put that shit in the books!
And you know what…I think I will do that! Of course, I weighed in this past Thursday (my first Lifetime weigh-in) and I was up 2 lbs but I expected that. Not that I haven't been on program because I have! And I earned the most AP’s (activity points) I ever have before…49!! But I’ve also been having some other body issues and I think that might have contributed. I’m still 6 lbs under my goal weight and am averaging right around where I did during the maintenance phase. Truth be told, I feel great!!
So how am I going to do this…I’m going to work on hitting the 100 lb mark first off. So I guess you can say that the scale WILL be controlling me in some aspects for the next couple of weeks. Technically I don’t have to weigh-in again till February and maybe I wont. We’ll play this by ear. To be honest, I don’t think I would want to maintain the 100 lb mark because I like where I am right now. So this needs some more attention mentally I think.
What do I do after that?? I say “SCALE…SCHMALE!” (pronounced: Shhhhh-male) I start to learn to focus on the important things I do for myself that are not based on what the scale tells me. Sure, I wont be able to send my Thursday night tweet telling you all how much I am up or down. And sure, I wont have you guys praising me for hitting another 5 lbs lost of anything else like that. But I still have a lot of great things to do for myself! I have many things to accomplish and be celebrated!!
Maybe that is something I will do. Instead of weekly weigh-ins, I will do a sort of weekly-accomplishments type of thing. My dear friend Sheryl, aka, *bitchcakes* does this, as well as many other great bloggers out there and they always inspire me to sit down and really think about all the great things I accomplished that week.
I’ve been kind of in a slump in the blog-writing and for that I apologize, and this post might be kind of bland and all over the place but I think it’s a good reflection of how I’ve felt the past couple of weeks. I’ve spent the past 2 years of my life LOSING weight. Now I’m here and I have to just be, and that is not as easy as it sounds. Just like many told me, the real journey is beginning. So not only do I have to learn how to live my day to day life as someone who is no longer losing weight, I also have to learn how to write a blog as someone who is no longer losing weight.
So what are my accomplishments of the past week right….well you’re gonna have to wait a day or two for that because my beer is empty and this post is far too long already